book review

first they killed my father,
​a daughter of cambodia remembers
by loung ung

SYNOPSIS

One of seven children of a high-ranking government official, Loung Ung lived a privileged life in the Cambodian capital of Phnom Penh until the age of five. Then, in April 1975, Pol Pot's Khmer Rouge army stormed into the city, forcing Ung's family to flee and, eventually, to disperse. Loung was trained as a child soldier in a work camp for orphans, her siblings were sent to labor camps, and those who survived the horrors would not be reunited until the Khmer Rouge was destroyed.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

An author, lecturer, and activist, Loung Ung has advocated for equality, human rights, and justice in her native land and worldwide for more than fifteen years. Ung lives in Cleveland, Ohio, with her husband.

REVIEW
5/5 *

When I was 23 years old, I spend a few weeks in Cambodia while travelling around South East Asia. I admit, that at the time, I knew very little of the country or it's history. I knew the countryside was dangerous due to landmines from a civil war they had in the 1970s, but that was about it. I don't remember if we learned anything about the Khmer Rouge in school, but I certainly didn't remember it. As with all countries I travel to, I love to learn about the history and the culture. I love seeing how others live.

While staying in Phnom Penh, I discovered a day trip that would cover the history of the Pol Pot Regime. We visited the prisons, saw the torture devices, drove through the rural areas where there are still landmines hidden in the fields and saw the farmers that have lost limbs working those fields. We were then brought to the "Killing Fields" of Choeung Ek. It was just a huge field with large areas of sunken ground, and a Stupa in the middle. I didn't really understand what I was looking at, but I could feel it. I could feel the heaviness before I realized what this was. The sunken ground were the remnants of huge pits where millions of Cambodians were executed and thrown into. The grounds I stood upon where just one of over 20,000 grave sites discovered after the war. In total, approximately 1.7 - 2.2 million Cambodians were either executed or starved to death between 1975 and 1979.

I thought I understood. That was, until I read this book. Well, to be truthful, I didn't actually read it, but I listened to the audiobook. I don't shy away from the stories that are hard to listen to. I want to know what happened. I almost NEED to know it. I have lived a pretty safe and sheltered life in Canada, but I know that there are many that are not as lucky. 

I had gone down yet another deep dive into books written by survivors of the holocaust, mostly because no matter how much I learn, my brain just cannot understand that much hate and evil. After visiting Dachau outside of Munich on a layover back from Europe, the feeling I felt stepping onto those grounds transported me back to the feeling I had felt in those fields in Cambodia all those years earlier, when I had no idea the magnitude of the genocide. I knew that I needed to know more, not the glossed over tourist version I given on my tour. 

The title caught my eye, and I knew it had been written as a first hand account. I had no idea that it had since been made into a movie. I also did not take into account that this first hand account was that of a child. I don't know if it is because I myself am a mother, but hearing what happened from the memory of a little girl hurt my soul. I have never had to take a break from a book before, even the hardest of reads, but knowing that this small child, and so many other small children were subject to such horror was overwhelming. I listen to audiobooks on my commute to and from work, approximately 45 min - 1 hour each way. There were several times that I had to stop listening half way and turn on upbeat music as to not fall into a puddle of despair before starting my work day. 

The description and depth of writing made me feel as if I was there, that I could see what she could see. Being an empath does not help this. The bravery and intelligence of this young girl, forced to grow up way too early, and to learn far to hard of lessons before even hitting double digits will seep into even the most hardened hearts out there. She was resilient, resourceful, strong, yet never lost her love for her family and her desire to be with them again after being separated by such tragedy. There are so many adjectives that I could use to explain how wonderful, yet heartbreaking, this memoir is, but I don't think any of them would do it justice. This is a book that everyone needs to read. This is a story that everyone needs to know. So that history such as this cannot repeat itself. So that "western" civilizations can't just ignore those third world countries unless they benefit us in some way. We are all part of the human race, and no one should ever be afraid of prosecution by their government because of who they are.

THE MOVIE

The screenplay was written by Loung Ung and Angelina Jolie, who also directed the movie, First They Killed My Father was released in 2017. It is currently playing on Netflix. Visually, I don't think it could have been done any better. With times of little dialogue, the visual aspect tells a story that does not need words. Casting Cambodian children and keeping the language with subtitles in English, make the story feel more authentic. There aren't many movies that I like as much as the book, but this one is close.